Moment of the day: Choking on christmas dinner. Not because I like choking, but because I'd been caused to choke by my Grandfather's declaration, in all seriousness, that "That magician Paul Daniels is a very clever bloke, such an intelligent man. That stuff he does, he must be a genius." God bless my Grandfather.
I staged being woken up at 7am. I was sat wide awake when I heard someone get up to go to the toilet, so I stumbled out of my room pretty quickly mumbling something about being "Woken up" and "Well I can't go back to sleep now" and "We'd just as well open the presents hadn't we?"
I got a lovely laptop. It's beautiful <3 She's called Gretchen. I figured it must be female because males don't PMS. Seriously, I've had it for a few hours and it's getting temperamental and whinnying every time I click something. Fucking women.
I feel sick, not because I've eaten too much but because I've just eaten the cheapest chocolate in the world. I can taste the chemicals and the liver failure. You can say goodbye to your auntie Megan right now.
Merry Christmas Fuckers
xXx